Why I Hate Double Relationships?
This article is geared towards single folks, and it can be an help material for parents to better help their teens when it comes to the issue of relationship, or finding a life partner.
Double relationships is defined as “dating” two people at the same time, and planning your life around them at the same time.
When I was single, I have watched friends who were in double relationships, and most of them think it is just fine, and nothing is wrong with it. So I decided to join the league of my friends in double relationships. I thought it was cool, and great, but little did I know that I was making God unhappy, and also causing a great damage to people’s life. I do not believe in sampling ladies anymore long before I met my wife.
Long before I met my wife, I visited a pastor’s friend, and he gave me a piece of advise about relationship, he said, “When it comes to relationship, you should be impeecable”. He says that we are not worldly people who do not care about what happens, we are Christians, and we ought to maintain our clean testimony among all people.
Many Christian young people today are living double relationships life, and not knowing dangers that await them in the future. As someone wisely said, “you are free to make choices, but not free from the consequences of your choices”. Every decision will make today will either help us or hunt us tomorrow, and that is the reason why you need to think before you do it. And many people are doing it because that is the order of the day, but it should not named among Christians. We should despised double relationships or dating as you want to call it. Young people give excuse that, “I am just getting to know them so that I can know which one to pick”, but I tell you that you are most confused to decide when you have to pick between two options.
There are dangers in double relationships, and that is why I hate it, and anything tht is dangerous to you, God wants you to stay away from it. It is not about what you want, but about what pleases Him.
What are some things that you should understand about double relationships? What is wrong with Double relationships?
- First, It makes you a Liar
God hates lying, He calls lying an abomination to him. Pro 12:22 Lying lips are abomination to the LORD: but they that deal truly are his delight.
It is also mentioned among six things that the Lord hates and despises so much in the Book of Proverbs chapter 6. Just like he hates the sin of homosexuality, wearing clothes that belong to other gender, he really despised lying.
Just because everyone is doing it does not mean that you should do it. You should dare to be different and stand out from the crowd of double daters.
He is a life of man that is into double relationships.
His phone rings, then the call comes from Bunky, and during their conversion on phone, Sanky calls, and for several times, Sanky was unable to reach him because he was talking to Bunky. Then finally, her call comes through, and she asked, “Who were you talking to?” Oh, it was one of my sisters. What a pathetic life! What a cold hearted liar!
Everytime you are spewing your lying out, you are making God sick through your lies.
Ephesians 4:25 Wherefore putting away lying, speak every man truth with his neighbour: for we are members one of another.
- Secondly, it makes you untrustworthy.
Trust is the foundation of every relationship. How then can I trust someone that habitually lies. If you cannot be a man or woman of your word, then you cannot be trusted.
Trust is not a commodity that is giving out every time, trust must be earned.
When there is a breach of trust in a relationship, it creates fear. We should be able to live honestly with the people we claimed to love. Trust is saying that I can depend on you
Heb 13:18 Pray for us: for we trust we have a good conscience, in all things willing to live honestly.
- Third point, It makes you unfaithful
Faithful means I can count on you.
Pro 25:19 Confidence in an unfaithful man in time of trouble is like a broken tooth, and a foot out of joint. Don’t let the fault comes from you, once you have committed yourself to a relationship, you should stayed committed to it. if you are unfaithful, and you are sampling different girls around, you need help,and you need to see your Spiritual leaders to help you out.
4. It can cause problem in your Future marriage
1 Timothy 6:6 But godliness with contentment is great gain.
How do you know that you made the right decision when you are sampling girls around? How do you know that the one you are married to is the right one?
Many of you want to be married, right? But you are not content with one relationship. Don’t you understand it is male and female, and not males and female, and male and females. If you are not content with one person when you are still single, do you think you would ever be satisfy? Because you will begin to compare them with one another when you finally settle down, and there will be regretting that you should have gone for that one instead of this one.
Even when you have little problem in your home, your past behavior will be hunting you like ghost in the desert.
Bible tells us, “Godliness with contentment is great gain”
Most of you must have been sleeping with the person tht you said you want to marry. It is wrong, it is evil, it is sinful, it is dangerous, and God will judge.
Why Singles Get Involved in Double Relationship?
There was an open forum for single guys, and they were asked why they are involved in double relationships, and many gave good excuses that are not acceptable before God. But I will sum up everything into three points.
- Lack of Faith in God.
When asked, “do you believe in God?” Many will soundly answer yes, but many do not believe that God can give them the right person to marry, but instead they want to help God by doing it their way instead of his way.
Pro 3:5-7 “Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
Be not wise in thine own eyes: fear the LORD, and depart from evil.”
Sleep like Adam did, sleep to yourself, sleep to the feeling, emotions, and pressure, and let God handle it. If you can trust God for salvation, why not trust him to give you your own husband/wife.
- Lack of Firmness in one’s Decision.
Double minded man is unstable in all his ways, and that is exactly what the Bible teaches. Don’t let the peer pressure and wrong influences to get you into double relationships. Be strong in your determination to do what is right, no matter the cost. Right is always right, and wrong is always wrong.
James 1:8 A double minded man is unstable in all his ways.
- Lack of Godly Accountability
Who are you accountable to? If you say, God, then are you doing those things that are right in His eyes?
Accountability strengths people, it encouraged you, and sharpened you.
Make yourself accountable to someone that can help you make a right decision. Journey of life is not meant to be traveled along, but with the company of others who are on the same journey as you.
Build your life and your future on truth, and in the future you will be happy that you live your life to the glory of God. And then you will be able to tell your children, do as we did. My candid advice to you is, “Don’t get into relationship until you are ready for marriage, and commit yourself to stay pure for the right person.